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The Culture Club: Your Guide to Braving the Flagstaff Winter

The Culture Club

Musings on arts, culture and more in Flagstaff, Arizona - from the staff of Flagstaff Cultural Partners

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Your Guide to Braving the Flagstaff Winter

I was 18-years-old the first time I ever drove in the snow. It was the middle of a storm. 9:00 at night. I had just gotten off work at Brandy's Restaurant, and I lived near NAU. I didn't know what to do. I called my dad in tears, and he told me, "I'm two hours away. There's nothing I can do to help you. You just have to be careful. You'll make it home fine."

I did make it home fine, and then I froze all night in my 58 degree apartment. College students don't care if they can't feel their eyes as long as the electric bill is under $100. Since the poor days, I've collected tips and keys for braving the Flagstaff winter. Follow this friendly advice, and I promise the 2011-2012 winter season will be joyful and warm.
1. If you don't absolutely have to leave the house in the middle of a storm, don't. Seriously, though, just stay home, watch Elf. Turn the heat up a couple degrees, just for today. Drink extraneous amounts of hot cocoa. Don't even get dressed on a storm day. Wear slippers and a robe all day. Don't shower either. Wet hair will make you cold.
2. If there's no way around work or class or your kid's ballet recital, you have to prepare to leave the comfort and warmth of a nice house. First step, clothes:
2.1. Layering isn't as easy as it seems. You can't just throw every item of clothing on and walk out the door. Nay, nay. Layering must be done with precision. Efficient layering is absolute key to maintaining optimal body temperature.
2.2. Underwear. Long johns are preferable for those facing the elements. A nice thermal long sleeve t-shirt is not only fashionable (kind of?), but it ensures your core will remain nice and toasty.
2.3. Jeans. They have to be nice and thick. No leggings or jeggings allowed. Or you'll freeze. The legs often go unattended to because of the intense focus on the feet, but proper jeans will not only insulate the extremities, they will also warm the hiney. Nothing's worse than popsicle hiney.
2.4. Sweater. This is where it gets tricky. You can't just throw any sweater over a thermal shirt. You'll be sweating the second you walk into a public building that doesn't care about its gas bill. Sweaters must always be removable. For this reason, a thin t-shirt is preferable over the thermal (don't want to be showing off your delicates), then a sweater that can easily be taken off without looking like a stripper.
2.5. Jacket. Is the pinnacle of a stormy day outfit. The icing on the cake. The cherry on the sundae. The heat in the hot fudge. (Why are all my metaphors about sweets?) The jacket insulates and keeps the body heat created by the under-layers in the under-layers. There are a million ways you could go with this one. White is a personal favorite. It makes me feel like part of the storm. Although, bright neon orange is best for bikers and walkers.
2.6. Accessories. Finally, the best part of a winter outfit.
2.6.1. The scarf not only keeps the exposed neck and chest area toasty, it's really good for covering your mouth and lower face as you walk into the wind. No chapped lips here.
2.6.2. Gloves are a necessity for those carrying object or with any possibility of maybe carrying objects later. Also for the drivers. Steering wheels are like icy rubbery death grips. I think once my fingers literally froze to my steering wheel, like a tongue on a flagpole. Seriously.
2.6.3. Lastly, and most importantly, are the socks and shoes. Wool socks are best, but I understand not all of us can afford $30 socks. Letsberealhere. Layering socks is a dangerous game. Slightest bit of moisture in those boots, and your toes are toesicles for 24 hours. This is why the shoe is critical. Must. Be. Waterproof. No exceptions. Best case scenario, you can tuck your jeans into the boots whilst walking to avoid wet pants. Once the hem of your jeans is wet, the water somehow creeps up until it's in the crease of your knee. Unacceptable. Cold. Just don't let it happen.
3. Once the winter storm outfit is perfected, you're ready to leave your house and trek through the elements. Walking on icy, wet, snow-packed ground is no easy feat. The key here is no NEVER, under ANY circumstance, remove your back foot from the ground before your front foot is securely placed on a slip free area. Ladies, get that bounce out of your step. Fellas, leave the strutting to the tools with wet butts.
4. If you must leave your home on storm day, drive like a paranoid scared-to-die freak. If you're topping the 20s, you're driving too dang fast. The reason accidents happen in the middle of a storm is because fast drivers think the slow drivers are stupid. Maybe, but they're also not missing half their bumper to the tree on the other side of the ditch. And last time I checked, their pride is still in tact, also.
5. De-thawing. Possibly the most important aspect of winter weather. No matter how well you prepare, you'll always forget something. The trick with warming back up is to let your body take care of itself. Don't sit in front of a stove until your back turns red. Your ears will supposedly warm up faster, but in reality, they burn and tingle and don't feel good at all. Fingers and toes are the most difficult to properly reheat. Don't let them heat too quickly, or you won't be able to walk or hold a glass of hot tea for an hour. Not all burning is good. Never, ever take a scolding hot shower in an attempt to warm. Never drink coffee or cocoa or tea too fast. You'll scold your tongue and it will go numb. Then you can't even enjoy the delicious winter treat. Be cold for a minute. Let body heat do what it's supposed to do.

6. Enjoy all the pretty things that only come with a Flagstaff winter.

(All beautiful Flagstaff winter photos are taken by the talented Justin Capp)

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